Where am I going asked the blog

This blog is going nowhere. Would help if I wrote more.

WickedGayBlog.com: Quote of the Day :: Rob Thomas (Matchbox Twenty)

WickedGayBlog.com: Quote of the Day :: Rob Thomas (Matchbox Twenty)

I personally don't see why it's so important be given the word marriage.  Civil union is fine with me.  I thought 'marriage' was a mere religious thing.  I know most feel marriage is due us.  I say civil union is good enough.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Post, read, post...

I'm completely twittered out!  Information overload today.  Am I addicted to the internet?  I don't care if I am. I'm having fun. :)

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Provincetown clinic to offer evening urgent care

Great idea.  Now if they could only provide some mental health care.  They can never seem to keep a psychiatrist.  See Provincetown Banner

Technorati Tags: provincetown,health

article. 

Boycott Provincetown?

Just read a ridiculous post from a bitter D.J. in Boston who is calling for a boycott of Provincetown because of two girls who were attacked by a homophobe.  It was a terrible event and I hope the girls are alright.  The guy is going to be arraigned on several charges including assault on a police officer.

Back to this D.J.  A season or two ago he was allegedly beaten by police here in town when they went to this house he was spinning at due to complaints about the noise.  I’m not denying that he was roughed up by the police, but that’s old news.  Unfortunately this idiot hasn’t let it go.  He’s calling for a boycott of Provincetown because of the recent crime.

Boycott?!  If we boycotted every place because of crime we’d be locked up in our homes with no where to go.  Provincetown was busy this weekend and will continue to be through the summer with both gay and straight visitors.  I don’t think many people are going to listen to this bitter queen. B.S. You are old news and quite irrelevant!

 

Technorati Tags: Provincetown,crime,opinion,hate crimes,gay

No breakfast to serve.

I was up early this morning and thinking how grateful I am that I am not waiting tables at breakfast.  It was a complete nightmare on Memorial Day weekends.  Hung over girls in bad moods, ordering sides of well done bacon and hash, rude and generally just a pain in the ass.  I do not miss those days.

First Memorial Day home.

This is my first Memorial Day home, not working.  Not dealing with the madness that invades this quiet corner of the world.  I know most people like to have fun, but I’m at a stage in my life when avoiding the parties, the bars and the workplace is the most beneficial for me.  My health will not allow it anymore.  Not to say I’ve got one foot in the grave.  However, so many years have passed living with AIDS and bi-polar as well as being a cancer survivor; well it’s taking it’s toll.  I’ve had several friends last year tell me that my plans to go back on disability are wrong.  That I’m giving up.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  For me, giving up is allowing my mind and body to become sickened by work stress, booze and a totally rude and crazy boss.  I’ve been told that I’ll just be living off the system.  To them I say: we all live off of something.  I used to live off of the tips given by those who often times spent good money on shitty food.  I have no guilt going back on disability.  I gave it my best.  Now it’s time to take care of myself.  No booze, no late night craziness.  That much I have given up!

Grant may aid in proposed garden purchase in Provincetown - - Wicked Local - Cape Cod

I don’t understand why, when the town is short on money, they need to purchase a garden.  A garden that would be sold with the adjacent house to a private owner who “might not allow” the public to use the garden.  In these tough economic times a price tag of over $250,000.00 that the town is willing to pay is certainly an indication that the selectmen have a poor sense of priorities. 

How about we spend that money on getting more restrooms in town?  Or maybe we can tell the tourists who can’t use businesses bathrooms that they can go to the towns new garden and pee behind a bush!

Grant may aid in proposed garden purchase in Provincetown - - Wicked Local - Cape Cod

Technorati Tags: Provincetown,opinion,goverment spending,budget,wasteful spending

The Birth Of Astro Boy

This brings back memories and it's in HD.

Top Gay Resorts

Provincetown made the list.  It is true.  If you want a more serene time, come after Labor Day.

 

Top Gay Resorts

Technorati Tags: Provincetown,travel,resorts,vacation,fun and leisure

Provincetown “local seafood” means frozen imports.

Browsing through some Provincetown restaurant websites I noticed so many of their menus state that they have “local” seafood dishes.  The recipes aren’t local and I’ll be damned if the majority of establishments are selling “fresh” local fish.  Most restaurants purchase frozen fish from Asia or Mexico.  Beware of “Maryland Crab”.  It’s probably from a can packed in Asia or Mexico.  Believe me, the crab has never seen the Atlantic.  I know all this because I’ve worked in establishments that have downright lied and made it quite obvious that the waiters must do the same.  If they want a job.

So next time you fork out money to tuck into that “fresh” lobster roll…buyer beware; its probably been frozen.

I don’t know how these restaurants get away with it.  But they do.  One of the many reasons I got out of the foodservice industry in this town.  I’m tired of lying about what’s on the menu.

 

Technorati Tags: food,Provincetown,opinion,restaurants,seafood,false advertising

Smoking and rolling my own..be damned.

Have come to the conclusion that I do not want to quit smoking. And the stress and bullshit of punishing myself because I can't manage without a cigarette is too much. Not to mention, I really do enjoy smoking. So why the hell should I feel guilty. My parents generation didn't have to feel all that guilt because they enjoyed a smoke. Yes. People get sick and die of smoking. That's life. Illness and death.

I'm going to roll my own smokes to save money. My friend said I would more than likely cut down because I have to roll them individually instead of having that pack ready to be smoked.

Craigslist and nicotine.

Good night's sleep. Enjoying my morning coffee and smoke-free. Not sure how happy I am about that, but that's the way it is.

Helping a friend operate a new digital camera, resize and post photos to Craigslist. Doing all this long distance and without the benefit of nicotine to keep me calm and focused. It's damn frustrating if you ask me, but most of the hurdles have been cleared.

Friend I'm helping is going to lend me money for smokes. How grateful I am. Don't want to make excuses, but my mental condition (bi-polar, which is probably not treated with the correct medicine) makes it unbearable to be without nicotine or some substance to calm me down. Detoxing from nicotine is hell, stressing me out, and making me angry and irritable. So bless my friend for helping me out.

Managed to move along in Final Fantasy X, winning the boss fight (Sin Spa) finally. It's taken me I don't know how many attempts, but finally got this game going.

It's been a whole day without smoking a cigarette. Well, I did find two butts with some cigarette left at the end. Not much but enough to give me a little rush. Disgusting to be smoking the end of a butt. Such is the nature of this nicotine addiction.

Off to bed after eating everything under the sun. A good nights rest and I'll be ready for another smoke-free day.

So long Facebook.

Facebook is turning into a bore for me. Just seems like one big electronic billboard. Not a place to discuss anything of substance. Tah, tah.

Image via CrunchBase

This is what I wrote on Facebook just before I diactivated the stupid, waste of time, account. I see nothing of interest on there. A bunch of self-promotion and invites to stupid applications like what Snow White character are you. Who the hell cares? I certainly don't. If you post any comment with substance no one gives a damn anyway. Total waste of time!
Think I'll stick with Twitter.

Blogger Buddy gadget for Windows

Just got Blogger Buddy Windows Gadget. Can post from my desktop which is handy.
http://tinyurl.com/oz3pke

First morning…

First morning without cigarettes and the day is going to continue this way.  Enjoying my morning coffee and trying not to project.

Afraid to talk about not smoking and quitting because I’m afraid I’ll not keep it up and smoke eventually.  This is how it usually happens.  I’m able to stop for a couple days then pick up again.  Don’t want to dwell too much on not having that nicotine.  Must keep my mind busy and find alternate things to do other than sitting down smoking cancer stick after cancer stick.  Everything will be okay. 

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,health,addiction

Saturday Night

Can’t say I’m doing anything exciting this Saturday night in Provincetown.  Sure there is a lot going on, but I’m content to go to bed early, wake up refreshed without a hangover and having spent no money.  Perfect. :)

The last cancer stick.

Smoking my last cigarette, then it’s cold turkey.  Been smoking like a fiend just to finish the last of them.  I could have thrown what was left out last night.  But being the addict I am and the fear of quitting, (putting it off), I did not.

So here goes…

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,addiction,health

Single Women's Weekend

Sunny and mild morning and Single Women’s Weekend has returned.  Doesn’t seem like a year.  Pretty soon Provincetown will be abuzz with event after event.

This is my first season after 13 years of living here that I’m not working, dealing with the crowds and the stress.  Though at times I might miss the excitement of work  I know deep down in side that I’m doing the right thing.  My health is taking a front seat this year.

Single Women's Weekend

Farrah Fawcett's TV Special

I feel bad for the woman. I'm a cancer survivor and wouldn't wish cancer on anyone and feel her pain. However I think her TV special becomes a little self-indulgent. I don't see the point in telling people you don't want pity when you are exposing yourself for the whole world to see. Very mixed feelings about this special.

Image via CrunchBase

I don't know about this 1&1 hosting service. A waste of money if you ask me. I did not know you had to spend more money a month to be able to input my own HTML. So customizing the blogs is out of the question. So I'm just skipping them and sticking with Google's Blogger. It's customizable and easy to use.
So, in a few days this blog will be at www.provincetownviews.net

Last pack?

I am buying my last pack of cancer sticks.  Then that is it!

New Blogs

I’ve set up two new blogs.

Provincetown Views will be about Provincetown from my perspective.  I’ll shoot from the hip.  Talk about the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I feel I have nothing to lose these days by speaking my mind.

Pebbles and Stones will contain a variety of entries.  Writing about my traveled past via stories and poems.  A creative writing blog.

 

Morning has broken.

Though the clouds have not broken up.  Overcast.

Debating if I want to create a custom domain for my blog.  Suppose it seems rather stupid since I don’t have a plan or direction when it comes to what I want from blogging.

Subject? What am I going to write about.

July 4th?

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,addiction,health

Thought July 4th would be a great day to stop smoking.  Then I realized it’s not just a week or so away.  What was I thinking.  I need to do this sooner.

Allright.  Enough.  I’m coughing again.  Do you really want to go through being ill, coughing up a lung for weeks on end?  Having to take antibiotics that make you feel worse before they make you feel better?

I know the answer is no.  So when are you going to quit?

Related articles by Zemanta

• Why do you want to quit tobacco? (mayoclinic.com)

Desiderata

-- written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s --
Not "Found in Old St. Paul's Church"! -- see below

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Love this poem.

Technorati Tags: spirituality,poetry,literature,inspiration

Playing Final Fantasy X and losing a few battles. Time to pack it in for a while. Hopefully like a jigsaw puzzle I'll be able to go back and see the pieces to win in a different light.

iphone quit smoking application.

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,addiction,iphone,health

Downloaded a iphone quit smoking app. Yet to use it.  Got good reviews.  Can’t think of the name right now, but will post it and my thoughts on it as soon as I start using it.  Right now I’m getting more coffee and having a smoke.

The URL you provided is invalid. Please check the URL and try again.

This is the message I get from Technorati after attempting five times to claim this blog. Yesterday the site was down. Seems pointless now to use Technorati tags.

Don't know why I started putting tags for Technorati. Site is down.

Independence Day

I know I’ve talked so much about quitting smoking and how much money it costs.  But after doing my monthly budget when I get on disability it is obvious that paying $230.00 a month on smokes is not going to do.  It would be foolish to spend food money and such on cancer sticks; no matter how much I like smoking and am hooked on them.

So.  July 4th, Independence Day is my quit date.  Figure it’s appropriate and not too soon so I will have time to prepare for the date.  Joining Quitnet will help.  Have use the online support before and found it very handy.

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,health,Independance Day,addiction

Sleepy today. Two naps only a few hours apart. Was going to fight it but realised I probably needed it. Do feel better having done so.

It's going to be another sunny glorious day in Provincetown.

Watched the full White House Correspondence Dinner video. A good laugh.

After over three weeks of feeling ill I'm actually feeling better. My appetite is back and I've more energy to do things around the house. It was such a disappointment to come home from the hospital weeks ago with the intention of taking care of myself. Such as taking my medications on a regular basis and cleaning my house so it would feel like a comfortable home that it should.
However, I got so sick that these plans were put on hold. I'm happy that I can now slowly work on fulfilling my new goals.

I am so sick and tired of being sick. More antibiotics and an uncertain "shadow" on my chest x-ray. It's getting so difficult to do anything physical for any length of time. Just have to have patience and faith. What else can I do?