First morning…

First morning without cigarettes and the day is going to continue this way.  Enjoying my morning coffee and trying not to project.

Afraid to talk about not smoking and quitting because I’m afraid I’ll not keep it up and smoke eventually.  This is how it usually happens.  I’m able to stop for a couple days then pick up again.  Don’t want to dwell too much on not having that nicotine.  Must keep my mind busy and find alternate things to do other than sitting down smoking cancer stick after cancer stick.  Everything will be okay. 

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,health,addiction

The Inevitable.

Doing my best to avoid the temptation to go out and buy smokes. 

And it’s not easy. :(

Killing one bird with too many stones.

Strange title I know.  What I’m trying to get at is it is not recommended to stop smoking and drinking at the same time one is starting new HIV meds and psych meds.  It does no good what’s so ever.  This last week and a half has been nothing but hell.  Physically and emotionally.  I’m still going through it.  Not drinking, because that will make matters worse.  But I am smoking again.  I don’t have to be told how bad they are for me.  Honestly it doesn’t seem to matter when I deal with all the shit that’s pumped into the body that make me feel ill.  So for now I’m going to continue smoking.  Not for my health.  For my sanity.

Constant Cravings

If I stop thinking about the need to have a cigarette and consider my desire to stay quit, the cravings aren’t so bad. I have an attainable goal.

However, the more I tell myself I have got to have a smoke the harder it is to fight off the cravings.

Honestly I do think it’s a stinky, unhealthy and all around bad habit.

Honestly I enjoy smoking and have no intention to give it up.

Technorati Tags: smoking cessation,health,nicotine,addiction